Early Signs of Spring

Subtle changes are afoot

As you can see from this picture of our back yard, winter in southern Ohio isn’t exactly over yet. But there are already some subtle signs that spring is coming.

For the first time since November, patches of lawn have begun to turn green. Squirrels have reappeared after an almost total absence for the last few months. And the ice on the pond across the road has melted, and there are several Canada geese hanging out there again, as they did all last summer.

Another, more ominous sign came near dawn this morning, when a severe thunderstorm set off the tornado warning sirens in the area. Lightning flashed constantly, followed by a furious downpour. As we rousted ourselves out of bed and headed to the basement, the sirens powered down; the storm had already passed on to the east.

Of Gus and Duck Tollers

Old dogs may not learn new tricks, but owners of old dogs sometimes learn new things about their longtime companions.

Gus (sometimes known as Gus Gus) is 13 now, and we have assumed throughout most of his life that he is a mutt. Golden Retriever-Chow mix, perhaps? A little Collie in there somewhere?

Ready for his closeup

Out here in the midwest, though, there are a lot of folks who are familiar with bird dogs. And an assistant at the local vet said old Gus looks a lot like a Duck-Tolling Retriever, an obscure hunting breed from Canada.

This became something of an inside joke in our family until, on our recent trip to Virginia, we ran into someone who had a Duck-Tolling Retriever. It was a dead ringer for Gus — size, coat, markings, demeanor, everything.

We became believers. We’re now convinced Gus is a pure-bred Duck Toller, which gives him some gravitas in the dog world. Our apologies, dude — we didn’t know! From now on we promise to treat you like the special canine you truly are.

Another Turn in the Weather

In several recent posts, I’ve focused on the cold winter we’ve been having, so in the interests of being fair, I would like to note that yesterday the temperature was about 70 degrees and there wasn’t a cloud in the sky. Short-sleeve-shirt weather.

It makes no sense that we’d have weather like this in mid-February, of course. Last year at this time we were getting a record snowfall. It’s just another example of the wide, unpredictable climate swings this place experiences.

Dog or Ermine? You Decide.

Violet’s fur is so soft that it has gradually dawned on us that she’s not a dog at all, but an ermine. I won’t go into all the details that led us to this conclusion, but suffice it to say that we are extremely savvy people and we gradually figured it out.

For you doubters out there, look closely at the two pics here.
I rest my case.

Invisible Rays

After you live in Cincinnati for a while, you gradually begin to realize that there is a layer of invisible rays that covers the area like a dome. Everything entering the metro region — trucks, planes, cars, even boats — must pass through these rays.

Proof the rays exist: This kale is only 2 days old

We’re not naive — we know the government is behind them. And while we may never know their true purpose, we can say that they remove all freshness and flavor from food that’s shipped into the area. Sushi? Tastes like cardboard. Onions? You’re lucky if they last a week. Shrimp? Traces of chlorine. Bell peppers? Wrinkled and soft. Mozzarella cheese? You could be chewing rubber.

Occasionally, chicken does get past the rays with its flavor and tenderness intact. Although we cannot say for sure, we believe the Amish are smuggling it in in lead-lined, horse-drawn carriages.